Nonverbal behavior is defined as actions and cues that communicate meaning in ways other than in words (Breckler, Olson & Wiggins, 2006). It includes a wide variety of cues such as facial expression, interpersonal space, eye gaze, gestures and vocal qualities (such as pitch and tone).
Most people will agree that nonverbal cues are one of the most useful tools in judging the emotion of others. Why is that so? One of the reasons why people see nonverbal cues as informative about others feelings is because it is not totally under voluntary control. For example, you could easily see that a person is nervous while speaking to you if her voice is quivering and she keeps playing with her fingers, even though she is trying very hard not to show her emotions.
Research have suggests that nonverbal information does enhance our understanding of interactions, it was found to be useful in improving comprehension of social interactions (Archer, & Akert. R., 1977). Personally I feel that nonverbal behavior plays such an important role in our life, such as finding a job or maybe even a spouse! For example, the nonverbal behavior that we display during an interview could either help us score during an important interview or make us lose the job even though we could have been the best candidate for it.
I found some videos that highlight the importance of nonverbal behavior during an interview.
However there also instances whereby nonverbal cues can contradict with verbal cues. For example, a person commented on your new dress by saying: Wow! What a nice dress sense you have in a mocking tone with a quick laugh at the end.
Would you rely on the positive words she used or on the tone that she expressed her views when it comes to interpreting the message’s meaning?
Usually conflicts as such occur when a sarcastic comment is made or when someone is trying to mask their feelings. My personal experiences of masking my feelings usually occur when I am upset and I do not want anyone else to know about it. However I am such a flop at it, whenever I am upset my facial expression is so obvious that everyone who sees me will know.
In addition to conflict between verbal and nonverbal behavior, it have also been suggested that there are differences in nonverbal behavior between different gender and culture.
My recent trip to Bangkok illustrated to me how culture can play a role in our nonverbal behavior. During my stay there I was invited to one of my friend’s colleague house to have dinner. At the end of the night, I thanked the family for their hospitality and made a fool out of myself. I went over to the host and proceeded to extend my hand for a handshake, but instead of reciprocating the handshake the host put her palms together and did the thanks gestures in traditional Thai gesture. Trust me, the others who was watching laughed at me so badly there were tears from their eyes (including the host!!!).
This funny incident illustrates the existence of cultural differences in nonverbal gesture. It is important to note that while being in a different country you should observe what kind of greetings and gestures are appropriate before getting yourself into trouble. For example, people on Eastern Europe people often exchange kisses on cheek as a form or greeting, or standing in close proximity while talking to other. These actions are greatly acceptable in the western culture but in the Asia context many of these actions are seen to be impolite.
To effectively illustrate the existences of cultural differences in nonverbal gesture, just look at the picture I have attached below:
Don't think about what nonverbal behaviour you did in the past. At least all that is a learning experience for you. We always look at non-verbal behaviour first. The way people stand, sit or hand moves, make me think a lot about how a person see me.
Sometimes, facial expression is something we can't really control. I got a colleague who always look sad, every time i see him i would ask 'who bully you?' But all that was just his normal expression. we should sometimes listen carefully to the content than just nonverbal behaviour. Though nonverbal behaviour is what make up parts of our first impression. Being yourself is the most important thing.
1 comment:
Don't think about what nonverbal behaviour you did in the past. At least all that is a learning experience for you. We always look at non-verbal behaviour first. The way people stand, sit or hand moves, make me think a lot about how a person see me.
Sometimes, facial expression is something we can't really control. I got a colleague who always look sad, every time i see him i would ask 'who bully you?' But all that was just his normal expression. we should sometimes listen carefully to the content than just nonverbal behaviour. Though nonverbal behaviour is what make up parts of our first impression. Being yourself is the most important thing.
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